The ongoing US budget crisis has had a “potentially irrevocable” impact on world coffee reserves, a spokesperson for CoffCom has told The Oracle.

CoffCom, the international coffee regulator, has released a statement blaming the US budget negotiations for a fall in worldwide coffee reserves.

“It’s very simple.” said spokesperson Antonio Mauritus “As the budget negotiations continue, the members of the US Congress are having to rely more and more on artificial stimulants to keep them awake. The most readily accessible stimulant available is, of course, coffee.”

“This means that the longer Congress is in debate, the more coffee is being drunk, the less coffee the rest of the world has.”

However, the problem is deeper than this, according to analyst Sigmund Auchtor.

“Not only is the US Congress consuming coffee at an unparalleled rate, but the ordinary people of the US are also drinking more and more of the stuff in order to keep awake during the endless news bulletins regarding both the shutdown and the debt ceiling. Furthermore, those in furlough due to the government shutdown are also seeking stimulants as they struggle to cope with having nothing to do during the day.”

While it is true that Congress and the American  people are drinking more coffee than ever before, this alone is not reason enough for world coffee reserves to plummet. A final – and perhaps most drastic – cause has also come out of the debt crisis.

If the US defaults on Thursday, it will send shockwaves around the financial world and call into question the use of the US dollar as a worldwide currency. This would have a highly negative impact on US trade, and therefore on its ability to provide developing countries with much needed dollars in return for – for example – coffee.

In light of this, coffee growers worldwide are stemming the production of coffee until the debt crisis is resolved. This will mean less coffee is being produced, which, in conjunction with the rise in coffee being consumed during the government shutdown, will mean an international deficit in coffee within six months.

“This is serious” concludes Antonio Mauritus “Deadly serious. If the US does not come to an agreement soon regarding the budget crisis, worldwide coffee reserves will plummet over the next year to the bare minimum. It is likely that the coffee industry will never recover, and chains such as Costa, Starbucks, and Cafe Nero will have to close or face bankruptcy.”

More on this story as it develops.


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