ON THIS DAY: DOW JONES LOSES RECORD 38.33 POINTS ON “BLACK MONDAY”

“I’m sure that the worst is over – if not, at least people will learn from this economic disaster in the future” – Herbert Hoover

On the 28th October 1929, the US Stock Market jolted down a record 38.33 points on what was to become known as “Black Monday”. As a result of rampant speculation, the weakness of the so-called “Bull Market” was revealed, and nervous shareholders sold stocks at an increasingly rapid rate. This led to more people losing faith, more stocks being sold, and eventually the whole damn thing imploding.

Luckily, Black Monday was the peak of the Stock Market Crash, and things got instantly better. In fact, only 24 hours later the Dow was up by 50 points and people everywhere were bathing in tubs of solid gold. Money was being used to light fat Cuban cigars; dancing women lined the streets; the cinema entered a golden age of frivolity and fun; John Steinbeck made millions with his novel “Everyone’s Wealthy, so Don’t Grumble”.

It was the beginning of The Great Depression, so called because the combined weight of everybody’s wallets literally made a depression in the Earth. Love was cheap and life was high; Communism was banished forever and World War Two was narrowly avoided because Adolf Hitler became a wealthy artist living in Bavaria.

What a time to be alive.

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