“Without them” said President Obama upon reading the report, “the world would be in chaos. Society would fall; civilisations would crumble; life would be meaningless. God bless those who think they have the right to interrupt someone to correct their pronunciation of the word ‘aluminium’”.
At the annual meeting of the Correct Grammar Society, the members were awarded a unique Nobel Prize for Services to Humanity by Malala Yousafzai (temporarily released from prison for the event). Yousafzai concluded the prize-giving ceremony by thanking every member of the society for “belittling people worldwide for the most minor of deficiencies” and “everyone loves being corrected”.
Members of the Society reportedly sent back a hand-written thank-you letter from the Queen after finding one sentence ended in a proposition. Her Royal Highness apologised and conceded the throne to the chairman of the society, Mr Roy Huddle.