“I don’t understand – all we did was throw him into the spotlight of an incredibly shallow business from the age of 13 and constantly judge him whenever he did something the slightest bit wrong! Why isn’t he acting like a saint?” – The World.
The world is reportedly shocked that Justin Bieber, a young man who entered puberty while rubbing shoulders with the most powerful people in the music business, hasn’t turned out “just as we’d like him to have”.
Complaining that they’ve dedicated their lives to following Justin Bieber’s every waking hour for 6 years and now he’s acting a bit grumpy with paparazzi, the people of the world say they are “disappointed” with how he’s behaving now.
“I mean, he’s 19 years of age and he’s acting like a teenager. It’s unnatural.” says mother-of-two, Wendy Harrison. “When we encouraged this young boy to dedicate his whole life to a business built on decadence and frivolity, we expected him to come out of it with a good sense of old-fashioned values. I’m ashamed that I ever believed in the good of humanity.”
“All we did was mock a pre-pubescent boy for having a high voice” complained Warren Smith, 22, “because that’s ridiculous. When I was that age, my voice sounded like Frank Sinatra’s. And then he goes and changes his entire image and we demand that he goes back to what he was, even though we made it very clear to him that we hated that stage of his career too! What a selfish bastard.”
The world is outraged that this young man has achieved fame and fortune before his 20th birthday. “Why can’t he act like a normal, downtrodden, world-weary human being?” is the rallying cry of his critics.