BREAKING NEWS: TIM BERNERS-LEE BANS THE US GOVERNMENT FROM USING THE INTERNET

“While you’re living in my house, you’ll play by my rules” said the inventor of the internet, unplugging the US Government’s internet connection “and that means no internet until you learn a little something about privacy.”

The inventor of the World Wide Web, Sir Tim Berners-Lee, has reportedly banned the US Government – including the Houses of Congress and the White House – from accessing the internet until they agree not to spy on people.

The ban comes just days after the latest news regarding the NSA’s surveillance techniques, in which it was revealed the NSA is actually monitoring the internet traffic of everybody in space and time.

Berners-Lee is “disappointed” with the way his gift to the world is being used, and has issued a statement saying that the US Government will only get their internet access back if they agree to abide by his rules.

“I invented the goddamn thing, so I get to decide how it gets used.” said Berners-Lee earlier today, “You can use it for having fun, playing some games, chatting to your friends, but you cannot use it for spying on civilians and German Chancellors. That’s not cool, Barack. I raised you better than this. Until you learn to play fair, I’m taking away my gift to you.”

“This is why we can’t have anything nice” Senators who oppose the NSA said earlier “As soon as someone starts misbehaving with it, it ruins the game for everyone.”

Tim Berners-Lee also warned the UK Government that unless they start to clean up their act, the same thing could happen to them.

“I’m in no mood for playing games, David” he said to the UK Prime Minister “So you just watch your back.”

Reports say that the US Government is now communicating with a tin can telephone until their internet is returned.

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One thought on “BREAKING NEWS: TIM BERNERS-LEE BANS THE US GOVERNMENT FROM USING THE INTERNET

  1. Pingback: This is from everyone | SoshiTech

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