The White Paper, or so-called ‘independence blueprints’, were revealed today at a meeting in Glasgow, shortly before all 73 MSPs were mugged. Alex Salmond, Scotland’s First Minister and leader of the Scottish National Party, had stuck a big label on the front of the plans with the words “My Best Ideas” scrawled on in thick crayon.
The “Best Ideas” dealt with a scenario in which voters had voted “yes” on the independence referendum next September, causing Scotland to become a country independent from the United Kingdom. In Salmond’s plans, the country was then turned into an “independence-themed” theme park, with high-speed rides and “more candy floss than you can shake a stick at”.
Salmond, a self-confessed lover of roller-coasters, said that the plans promised “an exciting new path” in Scotland’s future, and that children would be able to enter a competition to design independent Scotland’s first Hall of Mirrors.